WRITER • READER • RUNNER • RUMINATOR

A Few Eggs Short of a Dozen

While our family tries its best to sit down together every night for dinner, it just doesn’t always work out. There’s Boy Scouts on Tuesday, a Zoom meeting every other Wednesday, and…to be perfectly honest, its football season!

These are legitimate reasons to announce to our household’s two remaining minors: “It’s make your own dinner night.” Loud rejoicing usually follows, much to our consternation. We adults have “game” when it comes to cooking, and this reaction never fails to chip away at the ego.

But the boys aren’t bad chefs themselves. They have taken one of our ancient family secrets and upped the game. Since you’ve read this far, I’ll share it: EVERYTHING TASTES BETTER WITH AN EGG (or two) IN/ON IT. Our Top 5 regulars are listed below:

RAMEN: Our 110lb middle linebacker is a soup addict. If you can pour it, he will eat it. But his go-to soup for breakfast, lunch, and dinner is ramen. With an egg. And a bunch of other stuff…but I digress.

RICE: Our 97lb defensive end (did I mention how small our high school is? These guys were middle school starters!) goes for rice. Does he put an egg in it? Not on day one. But there’s no holding back if it comes out of the fridge on day two. You know how that rice can get all hard in the fridge? The egg fixes that.

BURGERS: Questions? It goes right on the patty, sunny side up. Bring a napkin.

FRIED SALAD: I wish those boys ate more salad. Alas, this favorite is mine (the family vegetarian.) You take the salad that’s been in the fridge just to the point where it probably should be tossed out instead of just tossed. Open the lid and sniff. Remind yourself how the cost of produce has skyrocketed. Then dump it in the frying pan with olive oil and garlic. Fry on high for three minutes, make a hole in the middle and crack your egg. Flip after a minute and sprinkle on a layer of cheese. Don’t get no better.

LEFTOVERS: Mix everything together in a large frying pan and fry on high. Add an egg or two to give the mass enough consistency to form a Leftover Pancake. Add cheese on top. Bring on the sriracha.

The daily egg consumption is subtle—“Papa, I only used one…”—but consistent. I do the bulk of the grocery shopping and I’m not sure it’s normal to buy two 18-egg cartons once a week.

Or is it?

Let me know your go-to recipes with egg…or suggestions on cutting back!

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